Anxiety Unmasked: Conversations on Men's Mental Health
Welcome to inspired men talk for solution focused therapists all in 4 different decades who openly and honestly discuss their perspective on the issues surrounding men's mental health, the things that stigma says we don't talk about. Hello, and welcome to this week's episode of Inspired Men Talk. And this week, we're gonna start a series of podcasts where we break down different things that we suffer from in our brains. So we're gonna start looking at today anxiety. And there's plenty of people in the world who suffer from anxiety, but do you understand what actually happens in our minds?
Benn Baker-Pollard:Where does it come from? How do we create it? But then obviously, most importantly, what can we do about it? And as the series progresses, we're gonna look at areas such as depression, maybe fears and phobias, and we'll see where we go as the sessions progress. So anxiety.
Benn Baker-Pollard:I personally have suffered from anxiety. So I worked in the police, and my workload reached a point where it became so bad that I was waking up every day with that dread that sits in your stomach. It's like a washing machine on a spin cycle, and it's the inability to sit still. I used to twitch a lot. I used to move a lot, and I go through this cycle in my mind where I'd worry about what my day was gonna be like.
Benn Baker-Pollard:And then eventually, I'd bring myself to get up and start moving. And once I got in the shower, it would subside and it would change. And it wouldn't be as bad as when I first opened my eyes. So where does it come from and what does it do? Well, we create anxiety by negative thinking.
Benn Baker-Pollard:So every negative thought that we have in our lives that we create, and that can be something that ultimately we can negatively forecast the future or we can negatively introspect about the past. But when we start to worry, so I like I did when I used to think, if I go to work, what emails are gonna be there? What disasters am I gonna have when I get into work? It could all go wrong. It's gonna be a bad day.
Benn Baker-Pollard:That starts to build my anxiety and in turn causes me to move from my intellectual brain, what we know is our left prefrontal cortex, and move downstairs into our primitive and emotional mind. And when we're down there, we basically go into, like, survival mode. And our brain thinks that we're in some sort of crisis or emergency, and it's trying to step in and help us and to protect us. So for me, the way it did that was to try and stop me from getting out of bed. Used to make me wanna stay there.
Benn Baker-Pollard:Used to make me feel those bad feelings in my stomach. However, when I actually started moving physically and I did have to tell myself a little bit to just get on with it, which is my intellectual brain upstairs trying to get a look in to say it's not that bad, it would change. So we can take control of how anxiety feels in our body and we can choose how we think and how we feel. And I'm gonna get Gary to come in and explain a little bit more from the neuroscience perspective of why that happens.
Gary Johannes:It's really interesting, of why we move from that part of the brain we call the intellectual brain, which is very rational, very logical. It will always come up with a proper assessment, whatever life throws at us, and we can generally cope. But what happens is as stress and we live in 2024. So there's lots of things throw stress at us. Now the human brain can't tell the difference between stress of being chased by a wild animal or or stress by, you know, what we've got a you know, there's no milk for the cornflakes.
Gary Johannes:So stress is stress. And if we get an overload of that stress, and it's constant, so there's always something to play on our minds, worries, concern, and some of what we have to do. But that continual buildup of stress, basic stress, basic negative thinking, as you've said, we start moving into that primitive part, that limbic system, which is there to help us survive its sole purpose as self preservation. And when we're in that part, it then actively looks for more problems. So it might be what takes somebody to that negative space is quite a big issue in their life.
Gary Johannes:They might be have a really challenging job. They might have a terrible relationship. But as we move into that space, it then notices anything that might be a minor problem, which we would normally cope with and turns it into a bigger thing. So we then we play on that. And the brain then says, we're overwhelmed.
Gary Johannes:We don't know what to do. And it only has 3 option clauses to cope with that excessive level of stress, plus anxiety, or depression, or anger, or a lovely old mix of all 3. And in your case, it was a level of anxiety. But what it then does is go, everything's dangerous. So how can I stop you walking out into a dangerous world?
Gary Johannes:That's it. I'll make you feel like you need to stay in bed. So there's a lot of science around why we don't push through those boundaries, but it's all about perceived. It's all perception, because we know there's no wild animals roaming around the streets of most towns in the UK. But our brains will convince us that it does.
Gary Johannes:And that primitive part of the brain is only 3 to 5 years old. It hasn't been updated for 100 of 1000 1000 of years. It's irrational, illogical, and will always come up with the worst possible scenario for any given event. So it sees everything as a potential problem. And the best way of not getting into a mix of a problem is to avoid it.
Gary Johannes:And that's what your brain was trying to get you to do. I don't know if Peter or Christopher have ever been in this sort of space where their brain is stopping coming up with all sorts of propaganda as why not to do something or go somewhere or be something.
Peter Ely:Yeah. So very similar to to Ben, I had issues with a really lovely client that I I worked with, and there was it was really small things. You know? Just just, like, can you can you get me an extra staff person staff member to come in and work next week? But as soon as their email pinged through, my heart rate would increase.
Peter Ely:And I'd always think that it'll be some sort of, some sort of crazy, outrageous request, my brain would go to this. This is going to be a really bad thing, and I'd avoid even opening the email. And, eventually, you have to open them because, you know, you start getting chased with them, and you'd open it up, and it would be a simple request of, can you help me get an staff person for, like, 2 weeks' time? But that fear that led into it led to avoidance for me, certainly. And and then learning about what we do and how we do it and why these things happen to us just made so much sense to how I was coping with things back then, or not coping as the case may be.
Benn Baker-Pollard:So Gary's on mute as always because we know he's useless at using his bloody microphone or his headphones. Gary, do I you put yourself back on mute, mate.
Gary Johannes:No. No. I'm fine. I'm fine. I'm here.
Gary Johannes:I'm here. One of the things is is that logical part you're buying. You knew that you should answer that email, and you knew it wouldn't be a problem, but you didn't have control. Yes. You've lost that control.
Gary Johannes:Your primitive brain, which was trying to protect you, was going, yeah, it might be a big thing. Might be a horrible thing. Don't do it. Don't do it just in case. Even though, intellectually, you knew that you didn't have the control, so you didn't do it.
Peter Ely:Yeah. And and it was funny because, you know, I I didn't work for the police force. I worked in a private security company. I wasn't saving lives. I wasn't on the front line as as kind of Ben was.
Peter Ely:I always knew that it was gonna be something small. You know, because nothing that I really did was anything huge or major.
Gary Johannes:What my friend then?
Peter Ely:Yeah. No. It it it really wasn't. You know? This was a a wealth management company, you know, and there was there was never gonna be anything huge there.
Peter Ely:But but for me, those emails as they came through would send me into that fight or flight mode. It would send me into that perspective of this is this is danger. Something's going wrong to the point where I'd asked to be removed from that contract. It got that bad.
Gary Johannes:Did that also make you a little bit more frustrated because you knew it wasn't real. So that frustration become anxiety in itself because you knew you was, you know, just not doing what you needed to do?
Peter Ely:Yeah. I think so. I mean, I was I was, I was very proud of myself in my job. I was very good in my job. And so to have that come up, it added to the fact that there was that thing that I wasn't doing, and then I was frustrated because I wasn't doing my job.
Peter Ely:So yeah. Yeah. It definitely did.
Chris Johannes:I mean, you guys talking about, what happens actually in the brain when we're in these situations. You know? And the fact that we call it the primitive brain. And I'd love to just kinda delve into that a little bit. So why it's called the primitive brain?
Chris Johannes:It's because it's the brain, like Gary said, that's been with us for 100 of 1000 of years, and it's basically what we use to survive as cavemen and cave women. You know, these threats that we would have faced back then would have created this anxiety. And anxiety really is just a way of increasing our strength and increasing our ability to protect ourselves against wild animals and other wild tribesmen. You know? And although we don't have to go out and do that now, that is still hardwired into us.
Chris Johannes:So when we do get an email from somebody that we may worry about or we get a bill that we can't afford, we still drop into that primitive part of our brain. And there's a lot to be said about the physiology of that about that part of the brain. And would any of you guys like to add into that?
Benn Baker-Pollard:So I think for me, and I and I know we're talking about how it's really small things and and a bit of what Peter touched on. Generally, the emails and the stress was small. But some days, that stress came to real life. Those emails were big. The event was big.
Benn Baker-Pollard:And what I found was is that, actually, that would be the thing that would overwhelm me even more because that was kind of the point where it was confirmation that it was gonna be a bad day and what I predicted happened. And, therefore, it kind of adds to that negativity to the pot of the fact that it is a stressful environment. It is gonna be bad and it is challenging. And you know, if you come into an email and says, oh, we've got some intel that someone's gonna be shocked today, and you go, great. Where do I start with that?
Benn Baker-Pollard:Because I'm already struggling to function today. And it's trying to how do I build my resilience to cope? Because it's not big things every day, but I'm perceiving that it's gonna be. And sometimes that does come to reality.
Gary Johannes:What what you're talking about is is what most people seek, and it's quite a buzzword right now. And over the last couple of years, which is the term resilience. But resilience comes from you having the intellectual capacity to make a proper assessment of what's going on. But you can only do that when you're in that part of your brain, which allows you to do that. Those left prefrontal cortex are in control, and they they they stop primitive messages of survival, which were unnecessary in that moment to come through.
Gary Johannes:They they they have a look at it and make a proper assessment. Is this really a problem, or we or is it not? And that's what the pop that premature partner brain will insist on and push through if we're moving into that excessive level of stress. So if you go back for your career and you view it back for your lives, there were times when big things happened, which were nice, unpleasant things, but you was able to cope with it better. Mhmm.
Gary Johannes:Yeah. Go, wow. I'll cope with that. And then another time, something not nearly as as big, but still maybe big, and you haven't been able to cope with it. And weirdly, it's not the big things necessarily what caused the overwhelm.
Gary Johannes:It's the capacity you had before you got that big thing happening. And that's where resilience lies in that middle. Because if at that moment, you'd been in your intellectual brain, you would be able to go, okay. What what's the proper assessment? What do I need to do?
Gary Johannes:What's the solution here? When you're in the primitive part of the brain, because you've had lots of those little pebbles dropping in, filling up that capacity. When the big thing comes in, there's no capacity for it. And then you go, oh my god. I can only deal with this from a problem issue, and I haven't got the resources available to deal with it.
Gary Johannes:So I'm now going to go into a state of anxiety, a state of panic, a state of avoidance. So That's true.
Benn Baker-Pollard:That's because I I used to rebel. I used to love going to big problems. Mhmm. When the wheels come off, I used to love pulling up into absolute chaos and sorting out the disaster that's in front of you. Yeah.
Benn Baker-Pollard:And I used to really enjoy it because you get out and you start moving stuff and you start changing stuff, and you'd be the calm that came to the storm. Mhmm. But somewhere, almost when I wasn't looking, a day appeared where that was flipped on its head. And all of a sudden, I didn't wanna do any of that.
Gary Johannes:Well, one of the big things there is, you know, we I was watching a video, by a quite famous new neurobiologist, And he was taking talking about when you make a big decision so he was talking about somebody. There was a riot going on. It was in America, so this guy had a gun, and then somebody come running at him. And because he was scared and the guy was waving around this thing in his hand, he shot him because he thought he had a gun, which actually turned out to be a phone. But he said, what you've got to look at was what was happening in that person's life who had the gun of hours before.
Gary Johannes:And if you're particularly going through a stressful part of your life, so you might be having a home issue before you go into that space. You might be having this issue that issue. You're might likely to make completely the wrong judgment. Okay? And if you go back months, and there's been stuff going on, filling up that capacity, When you're in that position to make a decision, you can't make a decision because that prefrontal area, which we call the intellectual brain, becomes sluggish.
Gary Johannes:It doesn't take on that level of, let's assume what's going on here, make a proper assessment. It doesn't get involved because we're so overwhelmed, so you make the bad decision. And if you can't make a decision, you go into anxiety and avoidance or both.
Benn Baker-Pollard:So I think one of the I mean, thankfully, I have the appetite more I'm talking about it now. My appetite to go back into that big situation is there because I've managed to get my capacity back in my in my space where I can cope with stuff again. And I I'm the one thing that changed the way I did that and got me back to where I was was actually learning to become a therapist because it is suddenly, somebody explained to me what's going on, but also how simple it is to change what's going on. And I think that's the crucial part. We don't talk about how it works, our mind.
Benn Baker-Pollard:But reality is is that once you understand this, like learning to drive the car, go have therapy, I'm gonna say, biastly, with solution focused therapist, I. E. Hypnotherapists like we are. Because then together, you can practice the techniques that you're given, and most importantly, emptying the stress that you've accumulated in what we would say is your stress bucket, through a really simple process. But most importantly, for me, a process that didn't require us to dredge over the past or talk to all the negative, which was a big relief for me because I I didn't wanna do that.
Benn Baker-Pollard:I didn't wanna go through it. Pete, can you explain to everyone why that's important from us? Why is it we use that model, and what's the potential downfall of going through the past?
Peter Ely:Yeah. Of course. Well, you you mentioned about your stress bucket there. And and when we talk about stuff that goes on in our past and we relive our past, we actually fill up our stress again. So I don't know if you've ever had the situation where you're talking to someone about something that's going on, and you get the the feelings that you had originally from when you went through that experience.
Peter Ely:Now if you've gone through that, that's because your brain can't tell the difference between reality and imagination. And so by not focusing on the past, by not focusing on the negatives, you don't have to relive that. You don't fill up your stress bucket. Focusing on your future and what you want to do helps you to empty that stress bucket. So my my kind of example of my from my life was that my coping mechanism for everything was alcohol.
Peter Ely:And I used to drink, and then I would get stuck in the in the brain thoughts of all of the stuff that gone on in my day. And it would just make me feel worse and worse and worse, and then then I start to drink. And then I'd think more about the negative, and I'd go through this downward negative spiral. So the the whole solution focus method actually changes that from being a downward spiral into an upward spiral by not thinking about the negative stuff or helping you to focus more on the positive aspects on your life. And we all have them.
Peter Ely:It might just be something really small to start with. It might be a good night sleep, a a seat on the tube. You know, that used to always cheer me up getting a seat on the tube. So it can be really small things that that make you feel that your day has had a little positive thing that can help you to start to see more and more positives. Because like Gary said, your limbic system starts with the big scary thing and then sees everything as a negative.
Peter Ely:So if you can change that around, then you start to see your positives and your limbic system works in the same way. You start to see everything in a positive way.
Gary Johannes:It's interesting because, obviously, I I'm I'm I'm very close to Christopher, and he went through a bad time. How easy was that or difficult was that for you to focus, Christopher, on those small good things to start creating capacity rather than revivifying the negatives of what go went on in your life?
Chris Johannes:Yeah. You know, at first, it it is really difficult. And, I certainly found myself when I was trying to find those good things. They were always about other people. You know?
Chris Johannes:And which is still okay. You know, we have those that are close to us, and you can celebrate those good things for those people. But it took me a while to be able to start actually recognizing and really appreciating, and it does start like Peter said, it starts with something really, really small. It can be absolutely anything. But once you do, it really does start changing the perspective on everything.
Chris Johannes:You know, even though you've got those big scary things that are still gonna be there. You know? You they're not gonna go away, and we're not we none of us are trying to pretend that they are. But it's where you draw that attention. You know?
Chris Johannes:It's where that focus lies. And if you really do create and find those positive things, you create more positive things. You know, it's not only that you start seeing more, you start creating more as well because your brain's already ready and active to look for the next one. Therefore, it will find the next one by making the next one. You know?
Chris Johannes:It's it it it all comes to 1 where you start that one positive, that one finding the seat on the tube or, you know, I had a really crackin' bacon sandwich yesterday. You know? Whatever it might be, When your brain's actively in that space, your life then starts becoming in that space, And it really does transform that. And it and it gets a a slow start. I know when I was there, it at at first, you start finding those little things and it's and those big things still outweigh those little things, but, you know, you keep pushing through with it, and it does really make a massive difference.
Chris Johannes:That makes a massive transformation. I think we need to talk a little bit before we wrap up, though, on because we spoke a lot about how we can be in that printed part of our brain, be there. And we're starting now talking a little bit about finding the positives, and it's how do we keep that intellectual control? I think it's really important that we talk about that. How we not only find those positives to be there, but how else do we keep our stress bucket down and stay in that positive frame of mind?
Chris Johannes:What can we what can our listeners do? What can you actually do, and what happens in the brain when we're there? You know? I think we need to just talk a bit about that before we wrap up.
Benn Baker-Pollard:How do we do it then, Chris?
Chris Johannes:Passing on to it.
Benn Baker-Pollard:Nice try, mate. But,
Peter Ely:you know, you're
Benn Baker-Pollard:talking about it. It's coming right back at your door.
Chris Johannes:Fair enough. No. So okay. So one of the things we have spoken about a lot is the stress bucket. You know, we've all said on all capacity, however you wanna look at it, that part in our brain that's dull is all the stressful, little, big, everything like that that goes on, and we all have that every day.
Chris Johannes:Things will go in your stress bucket, but we do have a fantastic way as human beings of emptying that out. And it's during our sleep, and I don't know most of you may have heard of REM sleep. That's called stands for rapid eye movement, and that's when we process things through the day. And that's where we empty our stress bucket. Okay?
Chris Johannes:So if we've got the normal level of stuff that's in our stress bucket, we'll wake up the next day, and that will be filtered out. And we feel better about those little things that bothered us the day before. But if we're putting loads and loads in that stress bucket, we can't have enough REM sleep to empty that. We only get about 10% of our sleep patterns, our REM sleep. So that's not enough if we've got a massive amount in our stress bucket.
Gary Johannes:20%.
Benn Baker-Pollard:Okay.
Chris Johannes:So where shall I pick up from?
Benn Baker-Pollard:Go from the top.
Gary Johannes:So sleep. So when when we sleep at night?
Benn Baker-Pollard:But oh, yeah. Or if you said you said rapid eye movement sleep.
Peter Ely:So then just leave a pause
Benn Baker-Pollard:and then come back in from when you said rapid eye movement sleep and then continue explaining what it was.
Gary Johannes:So it's really important, and it helps with 70 about it.
Chris Johannes:So yeah. And that's really important, That rapid eye movement sleep is really important, emptying that bucket throughout that we've put stuff in throughout the day. Sadly, though, REM sleep is restricted to about 20% of our sleep patterns. And if we put loads and loads and loads and loads of stuff in our bucket, then that's not enough to empty it. Okay?
Chris Johannes:So we'll wake up the next day with stuff still in our bucket, and then we'll put more stuff in top of that. And then we won't get enough REM sleep the next night. And it's just a vicious circle. So how what we need to do is basically stop restrict the amount of stuff going into that bucket. And, well, like we've already mentioned, the best way to do that is by positive thinking.
Chris Johannes:Okay?
Benn Baker-Pollard:I'll tell my clients to put a lid on their bucket. I say change your open waste paper book bin from being that style and change it to a pedal bin. It's permanently shut, and it only opens when you press the button to open it to put something in. Because we can go through life, and yeah. Okay.
Benn Baker-Pollard:I can't we can't sit here and say that every single day in your life, the sun's gonna shine and you're gonna get out with a smile on your face and it's gonna be amazing, and we're never gonna put anything in that bucket. But by changing that dynamic, making it that pedal bin, not everything goes inside. So that then when they have their REM sleep and we're getting our 20%, we are taking out maybe 1 or 2 things, but we're maybe only putting 1 back in. And slowly, over that process, if you stick to it, we increase your capacity to cope. And most importantly, some people will have maybe some rocks stuck at the bottom.
Benn Baker-Pollard:So you imagine that bucket of water, and then it's fall to the top and I chuck in some big heavy rocks. Now they're covered in slime, and I tell you to try pull them out. But no matter how hard you try, you can't lift them back out of the bucket. So we leave them in there, and we just cover them up with day to day life. So when we start sticking to this process, eventually, we will uncover them.
Benn Baker-Pollard:And then slowly but surely, we'll take those rocks out 1 by 1 And and that doesn't mean that we have to go back through the minute detail. We might not even ever have to talk, you know, cover that subject at all. You might not even think about it. It might just take it out as part of the natural process of rent. But how do we so then my question comes in.
Benn Baker-Pollard:How do we teach our clients then to keep that positive group going? What do we do to keep it going bit by bit each day to keep them in their positive mind?
Gary Johannes:So so for me, it's it's a a simple and becomes an easier process because it's about neuroplasticity, which is not a simple topic, but it's basically getting us habitually almost looking at what's been good. And, again, when I ask somebody who doesn't know, the whole process, they've just started working with me, and I go, what's been good? And they're looking for, you know, something huge. And it's like, no. Did you have an what did you have for dinner?
Gary Johannes:What did did you have a nice cup of coffee? Did you get a seat on a tube? And every time you do that, you release a little bit of serotonin, a little bit of dopamine, a little bit of oxytocin whenever you have any of those positive thoughts.
Benn Baker-Pollard:What are they, Gary?
Gary Johannes:Well, they're neurochemicals, so they're either hormones or neurochemicals. And, you know, like, if you take antidepressants to to help you benefit more from the serotonin then you, have. But if you make more, they're gonna be more beneficial. So the more you have positive interaction, which will release oxytocin, the more you have positive thoughts, you're gonna generate more, serotonin, and the more you have positive action. And you talked earlier, Ben, about getting up and going for a shower.
Gary Johannes:That small action produced dopamine and helped you then cope better with the anxiety. Now when we started this, and Christopher's been for it as well, I had a IT issue. My microphone wasn't working. My headphones and they all
Benn Baker-Pollard:Let let's just be clear. It's not just once, is it? It's like every time we sit down.
Gary Johannes:Yeah. Every time we sit down, and then I was on mute. And guess what? That was all negative, and it all went in my bucket. I mean, these guys don't care.
Gary Johannes:They put stuff in my bucket, but but I've got nothing else in the bucket. I don't wake up in the morning with any level of anxiety or depression or dread or anger, and stuff goes in my bucket. Of course, it does. Mostly little tiny things like that. But tonight, my REM will empty that because I've got to that place where life happens, and then I process it at night.
Gary Johannes:So the tip is is getting really thinking about what is it that I'm doing. And the number one tip is movement. And people go, what about exercise? Most people, not everyone, but many people are completely, uncomfortable, intimidated almost by going to places like gyms. But as they just move in a bit quicker, walk in a bit quicker, do the housework a bit harder, you know, parking further from the store will give you that little bit of movement.
Gary Johannes:So it's not necessarily exercise, but it's activity. But doing hobbies, what you enjoy, things because our brain would try and stop us doing things. So it's just stepping up, but not out of our comfort zone so it feels uncomfortable, but just pushing it and noticing, taking half a second to notice something pleasant, to be nice. I mean, put a smile on your face.
Benn Baker-Pollard:We've been calling it REM. All I've got is everybody hurts going around my head now.
Peter Ely:I've got shiny, heavy people.
Gary Johannes:Yeah. So what come I mean, we know the sleep term came first, but what a great name because you can't get away from it. But the younger people, unlike you people, won't know who they are. I I I've actually used that joke with a couple of people, clients, and they're like, who? And it's just it's just like it's, I I usually don't.
Gary Johannes:Yeah. Don't worry.
Benn Baker-Pollard:So we followed 3 simple steps, don't we, guys? What are those steps, Pete? Oh, in fact, I'm gonna get you Pete, Chris, and Gary. You can give us the 3 p's. So, Pete, kick it off from the top.
Peter Ely:Okay. So for me, the first one is positive thoughts and be be really happy about my positive thoughts about getting my seat on the tube.
Chris Johannes:Cool.
Benn Baker-Pollard:Chris?
Chris Johannes:Mine is gonna have to be positive actions. So doing positive things so that you can think about those positive things.
Benn Baker-Pollard:What's an action you can give us, Chris?
Chris Johannes:So an action, maybe just getting up and having that shower, you know, like you spoke about. Okay. That is a positive action stepping in the right direction.
Gary Johannes:Yeah.
Benn Baker-Pollard:The final one, Gazzer.
Gary Johannes:Positive interaction, which sometimes depends on your peer group. So I really struggle doing the podcast to get positive interaction. But positive interaction, when you do laugh, when you do enjoy you know, they talk about, you know, old fashioned money. They talk about, energy vampires and energy angels. So find those energy people you after you've had a chat with them about anything, even somebody you've met on the tube, who when you finish a conversation, you feel better than when you you left it.
Gary Johannes:It produces oxytocin. So any positive bring your mom, bring your sister, bring your mate, just interact in any way will generate positive chemicals. And while you're producing those positive chemicals from positive interaction, positive action, positive thought, you can't be putting stuff in your bucket. So that enables your bucket to do its natural emptying without you filling this up. And I think the last thing I wanna say is the number one thing which a lot of people struggle with is dwelling on the past.
Gary Johannes:We cycling negative memories. So I say if you find yourself doing that, think, actually, what tune when it comes on the radio, whether it's REM or whether it's any other music
Benn Baker-Pollard:Not everybody else.
Gary Johannes:No. What do I what what music can I not resist tap into? Or what's the music when I hear it? I'm always the first on the dance floor. Or what's my favorite holiday?
Gary Johannes:Who's my favorite thing? When I think about it, do I just feel good? So you've got some alternative choices of thought if you find yourself negatively reminiscing about things you can't do and think about.
Benn Baker-Pollard:What's your favorite song, Pete, that you've popped to?
Peter Ely:I've said this once, and I've said it a 1000000 times. It's Katrina and the waves walking on sunshine. Always makes me jump out of bed. Always makes me dance. Love it.
Benn Baker-Pollard:Chris, you got a favorite tune?
Chris Johannes:You know, I if I need to get on and do something, I always stick a green day playlist on. That's me. Green day. Stick a green day playlist, and it makes me shout and dance and move around.
Benn Baker-Pollard:Nice.
Gary Johannes:So I I'm an old fashioned rocker, so it's normally ACDC. So, you know, which is probably some of the titles don't really go with what we're talking about, but they really get you going. Or I'm also a big Leicester Tigers rugby fan, and they play deep purple, smoke on the water, so you can't help doing it. Well, of course, Rocky, That's the, you know, the eye of the tiger. It makes you feel like you didn't take anybody on.
Gary Johannes:But we've all got those songs.
Benn Baker-Pollard:Well, I'm I'm on Higher Love at the minute by and Whitney Houston.
Gary Johannes:Yeah. Yeah. It and that's
Benn Baker-Pollard:definitely one that gets me going at the minute.
Gary Johannes:Yeah. Yeah. And those things, they just change your state, don't they? You feel more capable in that moment. And those simple actions can be a difference between you having a good day and a bad day.
Gary Johannes:And those simple actions can change you from having a mental health issue to actually feeling like you're in control of your life.
Benn Baker-Pollard:Excellent. So, guys, we're gonna summarize this, and we're all gonna take a part of it to finish this podcast off. So remember, if you're suffering from anxiety, you've got that feeling, that washing machine stomach. It's not because you're broken. It's not because you're a bad person.
Benn Baker-Pollard:It's quite simply that you probably been piling a little bit too much in your stress bucket. And sometimes that happens without you even noticing it. It's just a series of small events that occur in your life, personal work, whatever it's gonna be that tip you over the over that boiling point a little bit. Just your bucket overflows. So what is our steps that we can take as a quick reminder for the ladies and gents who are listening on how to deal with it?
Benn Baker-Pollard:Pete, coming to you first.
Peter Ely:So, make sure that you get a good night's sleep. Try and maximize your REM sleep and, have a good sleep routine. That's number 1 for me.
Benn Baker-Pollard:Chris?
Chris Johannes:Yeah. You know, it's remembering that, you know, we've spoken a lot about this finding the positives, but it is really, really looking for those. At first, it may seem hard, but finding those positive things to be positive about and keep them in mind. You know? Write them down if you have to.
Chris Johannes:That's a big one for me. Because when you write them down, it cements that in that positive thought in a lot more. So writing down those positive things, that is one of the biggest tips I can give to anybody.
Benn Baker-Pollard:And, finally, try not to talk for too much, Gary, because it is the end. But what's the final step from you?
Gary Johannes:Talking to someone about
Benn Baker-Pollard:Did you see that, Jess?
Gary Johannes:Being positive. So it it it could be bringing up your mom and just talking about something nice. It could be do finding somebody a a tiresome job you're doing and finding someone to have a nice cup of coffee with them. So there's something positive in your job.
Benn Baker-Pollard:Awesome. Thanks again for listening everybody, and hope you enjoyed this shorter series on how the brain works. And there's more to come as we progress. Take care, and speak to you next time.
Peter Ely:Thank you. Bye bye.
Gary Johannes:Bye again. Goodbye, everybody. Have a fantastic week. Thank you for listening to the podcast that proves men do talk.
Benn Baker-Pollard:If you would like more information or support, then please visit inspired to change dotbiz,
Peter Ely:where you can learn more about us and the Inspire to Change team.
Chris Johannes:And remember, the conversation continues on our social media at inspired mentalk.
